This relationship was so wrong on so many levels but I truly loved him.We had been seeing each other for months now. I had to acknowledge for me it wasn't just a game. Jake might have been my first lover and I might have fallen in love with him.Calling him master started as a game, though now I was beginning to strongly feel, he was coming to be my master, my best friend. 'Do you promise to look after me?' I mumbled, I always needed his reassurance. 'Yes! Your master will look after you,. " Well that's where my brilliant plan comes in. I might know the perfect person. My brother!" Your brother? I thought he was at university." Yes he is, but it's only just outside Norwich and I'm sure I can convince him to do it. He is a bit older than you but a real hunk. What do you say?" Hey it might just work, but what if your brother is seen around again?" That's very unlikely, he will be at university most of the time and we will probably have moved again before he comes again. He is. Awrthom allowed himself no past, no future, nothing but the immediacies of his present pleasures. Although I wished to stay in that Satyric haze for all of my existence, I knew that he and I did not belong to the same worlds. I needed to seek my destiny elsewhere.He gave me money. I gave most of it to my parents to help them over my disappearance. I even had a younger brother by then. I left them in the worst way possible, I think. I stole out of the house one night leaving only the money and a. "Half the muscles are gonein this arm and two fingers on the other. They took out one lung andwho knows what else." There were tears in his eyes. "The seventy yearolds they're now drafting have more left in them then I do at 21."I took his right hand in mine. "You're an artist Heinz you can stilluse your right hand and you have your heart and mind. You may not bephysically all you were, but you have all you need to make your dreamscome true." I saw a faint smile as I kissed his cheek.We talked.
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